capeside golf

We had the most awesome workshop on cyber crime in school yesterday!
Although it made me slightly paranoid about using facebook, I think it was REALLY useful. Kudos to our school, they got something right, finally!

Other than that, school's okay. The single hand chairs are a real piss off, you just can't sit on them!
 I mean, you can't cross your legs, you can't dangle your legs (unless you're really, really short), you can't sleep on them, jeez!


My English teacher sucks! I hate it when English teachers suck.
But she's terrible! I mean, yesterday we did this amazing chapter by Khushwant Singh and she totally failed to capture the essence of his writing and explain it to the class.
SHE DIDN'T EVEN GIVE PROPER JUSTICE TO THE ENDING. 
(thunder roars above head)

My list of coolest English teachers who've taught me:

5. Sonia Ma'am (she was scary as hell, but this woman knows teaches really well. scary, but then we just live with that. kinda.)
4. Mukta Ma'am (eccentric, and she insulted me in her first class by telling me my elbow looked like a traffic signal. I love such people.)
3. Sucharu Ma'am (loud, but an amazing teacher and an even amazing person. I'm glad to still be in touch with her)
2. Gurinder Ma'am (this lady had such.. elegance. and poise. and her crooked nose reminds me of dumbledore. excellent teacher, knew how to capture our attention.)

And on number one, we have.. 
(drumroll)
1. Ady Ma'am (short for Aditi Bandhyopadhyay. She changed the way I studied this subject. Her energy was infectious! She made me want to grow up and become an English teacher. I could write on and on about her but I'd rather not.)

Aww man. I miss Ady ma'am!

eureka!

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion |||||||||||||||||| 76% Stability |||||||||||||||| 63% Orderliness |||||||||| 36% Accommodation |||| 16% Intellectual |||||||||| 40% Interdependence |||||||||||||| 60% Mystical |||||||||| 40% Materialism |||||||||||| 50% Narcissism |||||||||||| 50% Adventurousness |||| 20% Work ethic |||||||||||||| 60% Conflictseeking |||||||||| 40% Need to dominate |||||||||||||||| 70% Romantic |||||| 30% Avoidant |||| 20% Anti-authority |||||||||||||||| 70%

Wealth |||||||||||| 50% Dependency |||||||||||||| 60% Change averse |||||||||| 40% Cautiousness |||||||||||||| 60% Individuality |||||||||||||| 60% Sexuality |||||||||||| 50% Peter pancomplex |||||||||||| 50% Histrionic |||||||||||| 50% Vanity |||||||||| 40% Artistic |||||||||||| 50% Hedonism || 10% Physicalfitness |||||||||||||| 60% Religious |||||||||| 40% Paranoia |||| 20% Hypersensitivity |||||||||||||||| 63% Indie |||||| 30%

  Take Free Advanced Global Personality  Test
personality test by similarminds.com


Stability results were moderately high which suggests you are relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.
Orderliness results were moderately low which suggests you are, at times, overly flexible, improvised, and fun seeking at the expense of reliability, work ethic, and long term accomplishment.
Extraversion results were high which suggests you are overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense too often of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity.

trait snapshot:
messy, disorganized, social, tough, outgoing, rarely worries, self revealing, open, risk taker, likes the unknown, likes large parties, makes friends easily, likes to stand out, likes to make fun of people, reckless, optimistic, positive, strong, does not like to be alone, ambivalent about chaos, abstract, impractical, not good at saving money, fearless, trusting, thrill seeker, not rule conscious, enjoys leadership, strange, loves food, abstract, rarely irritated, anti-authority, attracted to the counter culture

:D

I feel a little crazy right now, hahahaha :P

(In a good way)

SCHOOL REOPENED TODAY!
It was good, it was bad, it was ugly.
But but, I'm counting on a few people to keep me entertained this year, haha :P

WC semi's starting in 5 minutes, so for a change, I'll keep this one short.

Look what I found>

-_-

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

fuck it all.
just, ugh. let school start already, i'd rather study than actually think. cuz when i start thinking, ^ that happens.

i really wanted to go out tomorrow and meet sucharu mam and archit and sahil and surbhi. and if this fucking strike happens, then it's a big fat disappointment.
the strike should happen, ofcourse. they're increasing prices to every damn thing (btw why the hell is everything cheaper in calcutta?)

in other news, monsoon has arrived. finally. so now instead of this scorching heat that we had, now we'll have humid. just perfect. now my hair will poof up because of the humidity and make me look like a moron, my skin will rebel against me and look shiny and FEEL humid, ergh. also, mosquitoes will return.
hallelujah.
when the fuck is the semi final? im so pissed i could return to playing football again.
not.

(saying not after stuff was actually cool once upon a time.)

but i don't wanna return to school so bad. i just need something to keep me busy. busier than i am now. i wanna get so involved that i really, REALLY just stop thinking.
because you know what happens when i think too much?
i start thinking negatively. and horrible stuff comes to mind, stuff like guilt. oh i'm loaded with guilt, everything is my fucking fault.
NO IT'S NOT.
i need someone to tell me that and mean it.
i really want to talk to you.
and you.
and you.
(i hope you all realise you're different people. -_-)

i don't like thinking this way. i never think this way. i don't know what the hell is wrong with me.
i really should be grateful to life.
what am i?
i confuse myself by the way i think.
but im grateful for everything i have in life. i really am.
i just keep forgetting to appreciate the nicer things, cuz the not so nice stuff overwhelms me sometimes.
thank you god.
seriously.
i wish my glasses were tinted a more rosier shade though.

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im listening to all these retro hits on the radio, and it makes me realize how i really love listening to the radio.
especially when it's raining, im laying on my bed, the light is switched off, im alone in my room.
i love that feeling.

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i've finally started working on my room's softboard. with all the pictures to be printed, words to be written and art to be drawn, it'll be done by next month, im pretty sure.
i'd forgotten what it felt like to just let go and immerse yourself in creativity. that intense feeling, it's magical and unreal, it's something you've created.
it's something that's you, but outside of you. it proves you're there, you exist in this world, you're not just somebody's figment of imagination.

is that too much to ask?

I hate being confused and that's exactly what I am right now. Grr.
And I hate the reason why I'm confused.
And I hate the decisions I make.
And I hate the decisions I can't make.
And I don't know whether I should be happy or sad or nothing at all.
This isn't fun.
I wish someone would understand what I'm going through.