Try

I wonder if you know yet that you’ll leave me. That you
are a child playing with matches and I have a paper body. 
You will meet a girl with a softer voice and stronger arms and she 
will not have violent secrets or an affection for red wine or eyes
that never stay dry. You will fall into her bed and I’ll go back
to spending Friday nights with boys who never learn my last name.

I have chased off every fool who has tried to sleep beside me
You think it’s romantic to fuck the girl who writes poems about you.
You think I’ll understand your sadness because I live inside my own.
But I will show up at your door at 2 am, wild-eyed and sleepless.
and try and find some semblance of peace in your breastbone
and you will not let me in. You will tell me to go home.

— (via clementinevonradics)

(via gabrielladressedinyellow)

Twenty ThirteOMG IT'S FREEZING.

Hello!

How have all you fabulous people been? Contrary to popular belief on the internet, I am very much alive, albeit much more involved with commitments in the real world (basically having a brilliant and very sunny and OH-DUDE-TOO-MUCH-HAPPENED end to 2012.)

Teehee

 When You're Offered Food..

Change

Change is good. Change is bad. And change is scary as hell.

On the lines of an autistic cat lady, the only thought that has been stuck in my head since almost a month has been, "All that starts with the year must be buried with the year's death." Kind of sinister, right? (Especially if you were born on 1st Jan, because then by my logic, you should be dead by 31st December. Happy happy.)

So that means change. And up until the moment of truth, we're pretty convinced that what you're doing is going to do you a whole lot of good and you're going live a much better life later. It might be a better job, dumping somebody, hell, it could be trying out new pants.
Until of course, you actually take the leap.

You see, it's called a leap of faith for a reason. Because once you take the jump, you're not sure what ground you'll land on, or if you'll ever land at all. What if we just keep falling and falling and that's the end of it? Or what if the change we're advocating to ourselves turns out to just make you even more miserable than you were? What if your new boss sucks, you end up forever alone or heaven forbid, those pants makes your ass look like a rhino's?

Dundundun. Thoughts of a realist, thoughts of a pessimist. All while the optimist flails around in despair, waiting for you to notice him drown.

All that uncertainty, all the second doubts and hesistations, holy crap. I wasn't so sure if I wanted to do this anymore. As humans, why are we so wired towards comfort, even if comfort doesn't keep us happy but is there simply for the sake of familiarity?

And so I waited. Waited for my moment of clarity, some sign of the supernatural proclaiming to me that what I was doing was going to help me. The new job would make you happy, making you work out and land a bum like Beyonce's, and then someone would finally put a ring on it ^.^

Turns out..
YOU DON'T GET A FREAKING SIGN.
*brings out the Nutella jars*

But then I realized, I don't need a sign. Signs are for idiots who believe that their life is in control of somebody else. We do things in our lives for sole purpose of our happiness.

So I took the leap.
And right now, I'm free falling.

Madness

Haven't you heard? Exams are here so Aka must procrastinate and make sure her blog is ONLY updated when there's 9712376532712 other things to do.

Anyway, felt like making a list. So, list: